Where I've Been

Greetings internet folk!

Now, it's not like I really have a following to have to explain to people why I haven't posted in a couple of months. However, even though this is a book blog, I wanted to talk about real life stuff that a lot of people can probably relate to.

In all honesty, this blog has been the last thing on my mind for the past months. School was wrapping up for me. I was very stressed about finals and scheduling classes for next year. Just all the fun stuff that students get to deal with. On top of that, I haven't necessarily been in the best head space to be able to sit down and focus on rambling about books. I have my own stuff that was bothering me.

Lately, I've been having a lot of epiphanies. Not about anything drastic. Honestly, just about really obvious things that I probably should have figured out or discovered earlier in my life, but better late than never, right?

The first one is that I really need to stop caring about what people think about me. I wish I would've gotten this memo a few years ago. For the most part, I've been writing my actual thoughts and such on this blog, but I will admit that I've been really trying not to offend people.

But odds are this is a blog that isn't ever going to become big or anything close. I'll be lucky to get a few readers. That's fine. That's not why I started it.

I just really need a space, besides my stories, where I can freely express myself and not be limited. That's exactly what this blog is supposed to be. Of course, I'm still not going to go out of my way to offend people, but I'm also done caring about being judged or having common opinions.

Hardly anything about me is common, but that's a good thing.

I see things a lot differently than a solid majority of the world. For so long, it's made me feel like an outsider. I've also felt this need to constantly keep defending myself when the truth is that I don't have to.

I like music that most people don't and look at me weird for. I over analyze books way too much. Instead of writing in a journal, I write novels to deal with my emotions. Most days, I'd rather be with a novel than a group of people. My idea of a perfect hangout is reading with someone else and then talking about our books. I work in a library and love it.

My second epiphany is that reading, writing, and listening to music helps me deal with my life. I invest a lot of time obsessing over a story I'm writing or a series or even bands, especially when things aren't going great for me. These obsessions don't ruin my life. I'm still a regular functioning human being. And there's nothing wrong with me finding refuge in such things. But for some reason I always thought there was.

So yeah, this really has nothing to do with much of anything.

I just really wanted to say it because it feels nice and freeing. Besides, there's always the off chance that someone might read this who needs to know that it's okay to be different and it's okay to deal with your problems in abstract ways. In one way or another, we're all just trying to get by.

I plan on going back to posting actual book blogs because I've been reading a lot and have a lot of book opinions I'm ready to share.

Thanks for reading and stay sunny <3